Homesick for a Place that Doesn't Exist



I clung to a man as we rode on the motorcycle.  Sun streamed on the edges of every foliage that left them glowing in amber.  The wind brought a distinct scent. The tarmac road bent, leading to a sharp curve.  There's a growing gentle chanting of cicadas and my instinct, in all its clarity, knew this is home. 

This was a recurring dream from my childhood that made me travel the world.
I was determined to search for this place. I am certain that my heart will tell, as soon as I get there. 

Sometimes, I had a nano-second glimpse. Fragments of similarities from my dream would be present in places that I have had the privilege of seeing. 

A subtle hint of Deja Vu. 

Weird, isn't it? 

I remember a dream of climbing a wooden ladder in a turret of an old castle when I was a teenager.  Eight years later, I found myself exactly in the same place. Same scent, same sound and same people were with me in the dream. {Read more about it here: Château de la Grève}

Remember the man with me on the motorcycle? 

Many years later, I met him.  It turned out to be my husband. 

Hence, the first time I saw him from a photo, there was an instant recognition. The first time I hugged him on a rooftop, it all felt familiar. 

It felt home. 

Throughout years of being preoccupied with worldly activities and setting aside spiritual pursuits, I have forgotten about the dreams. 

Sometimes, where we are right now, I still see bits and pieces of that particular road. At least a glimpse of the amber glow.  

However, lately I have been wondering. 
Does this place truly exist? 
Will I be lucky enough to find it in this lifetime?
What was your last case of deja vu?

Love & light, 
Arni

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4 comments

  1. Home is a feeling, not a place. Here's to hoping the journey there is as good as you've dreamt it to be

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    1. Truth hurts. :) Home is indeed not a place but a feeling. A light switch turned on recently and I accept it now. Wherever I am is home.

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  2. Wow, I wish I have this kind of deja vu, you know, the kind that you know for sure you dreamt about it. I only get a sense or a feeling, never of certainty. I do have recurring dreams, but I'm glad they don't happen in real life because they are not exactly beautiful.

    I think you had an amazing dream, and pretty cool that you got to see it in real life. I don't know where that dream place is, but I think wherever it is you will find it.

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    1. Thanks Marge, it feels good to somehow believe I will one day find myself there :) Hugs and happy travels

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