A Changeover

{Day 25 Saturday : Something someone told you about yourself that you'll never ever forget}

It took me quite a while to figure out what I could share with you today. I seemed to have forgotten certain parts of my life. Whispers of the past that I no longer think about, so I asked my Mom.  She reminded me of a story that I repeatedly told her, since I was in my pre-teen years until I finished school. So here goes..

At a fashion event
Someone told me once when I was twelve years old, "You're such a lousy dresser. Look at what you're wearing! You're embarrassing." With that he dismissed me with a disgusted expression.

That was my Uncle.  For some reason, he was mean to my brother and I, when we spent summer vacations with them.  

My parents lived separately and my Mom was kind enough to allow us to spend time away from home.  We came from humble beginnings. Being in a large family, we don't usually have enough money to do shopping. During that age, I was used to hand-me-downs.

The Outsider
There were some members from that side of the family who were a bunch of socialites. Unfortunately, they're the type that looks down on those who are less privileged. I thought for many years, perhaps, my feeling was an exaggeration, but I later confirmed that my observations were accurate.

Since we were staying with them during those summers, I had to tag along to attend  snobby lunch or dinner parties thrown by distant relatives. I felt unwelcome. I often found myself standing in one corner, as if I didn't exist. My aunts were nice, but distant cousins and uncles from that side regarded me with disinterest and disapproval. Even though I tried to communicate with them, they made it sure to highlight that I was different and I'll never be a part of their circle

So when my Uncle finally nailed his point with those words, it left a lasting impression. 
I was extremely challenged.
It drove me to prove him and the rest of them wrong. 

My Plan of Action
At thirteen, I started using my summer vacations studying Fashion Design.
I was the youngest in class. They treated me like an adult.
My Fashion Design classmates were in their 20s, 30s and 40s. 
Since I couldn't afford shopping for expensive clothes at that time,
I bought fabric from the textile market and had seamstresses create clothes I designed. 

I changed my style and vowed to work hard in school. I worked on constantly improving myself.
I learned proper graces and etiquette and how to conduct myself comfortably adept in social settings.
In my heart and mind, I promised myself I will never allow anyone to treat me that way again.

Life was kind.
Life slowly led me to experience different things that made me polish this side of me further.
Life guided me to socialize with various people, personalities I never thought I'd meet in real life who accepted me and acknowledged my presence in different scenarios from the work place to social events that are often covered by media.

Work Trip in Milan
I remember it was scary at first when I was invited at an invite-only red carpet event for the launch of a restaurant and bar owned by an internationally renowned fashion designer. We supplied customized lighting pieces for this project and I am honored to have worked on it. (Sorry, I don't have pictures of that event stored in my laptop).

I was hyperventilating in the car before marching on that carpet. After a while, events like that as well as cocktail networking parties became less scary and usual.

Last December, life arranged that I meet this Uncle again. I faced him and made peace. I let go of the past .
Looking back, I am extremely grateful to my Uncle for saying those words to me.  
Those experiences changed me, for the better. 
His words turned out to be a blessing. 


Have a great weekend to you all!
Love & light,
Arni


P.S. Check out other posts here

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5 comments

  1. Wow,it's impressive that you were so determined from such an early age - and so cool that you attended Fashion Design school during your holidays, I'm jealous =)

    I'm happy that those comments got the best of you instead of bringing you down. I also struggled whan I was a teenager because I was chubby and fashionable clothes didn't look good on me. Now I know that physical looks are not really that important and clothes do not matter to the people who really care. Nevertheless, I still like to have beautiful clothes :)

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  2. I wish I were as determined as you are. You seem to be a strong woman. Ive always thought of myself as weak.

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  3. Wow! Way to not let him break you, but make you a stronger person. I am also very happy that you made peace with the past and left it there. That is always a hard thing.

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  4. Just catching up on your posts. It's so impressive that those hurtful comments didn't bring you down but made you so determined at such a young age. It was also impressive to see that you decided to make peace with your uncle.

    http://missbbobochic.blogspot.co.uk/

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  5. i find your drive incredibly awesome and refreshing. some people just spit out excuses but you drive yourself and it's so so amazing!

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